Anything but Burnt Umber

I’ve been thinking a lot about employment lately. Some random thoughts:

• It is discourteous to leave a job without giving your employer two weeks’ notice. Unless you are being terminated, in which case staying an extra two weeks is considered anything but courteous.

• In Georgia, where I live, you cannot legally be denied a job because you are over 40. Unless you are over 70, in which case, the local Hooters’ manager can legally say “your saggy tits will never see the inside of a Hooters tank top.”

• You can, however, be denied a job based on your sexual orientation, something I discovered years ago when I tried to moonlight as a bartender in midtown.

• Georgia is an “at will” state, which, according to law, means that in the absence of a written contract stating otherwise, you may be terminated for “good cause, bad cause or no cause at all, so long as it is not an illegal cause.” That’s like saying, “you can buy this car in red, fire engine red, candy apple red, yellow, magenta, copper, orange, black, blue, royal blue, sky blue, white, mauve, beige, tan, green, British racing green, off white, cream, but not burnt umber.” Wouldn’t it be better just to say “you can’t get this car in burnt umber?” Lawyers.